Three Immortals Walk Into A Bar...
Fight

Levant

I growl to myself, my native language rising to the surface of my mind as it sometimes does when I am stressed. C’est quoi ce bordel, I think. What the actual fuck?

I’d wonder if I am in some kind of twisted dream, except that Maria is not here. All my dreams have Maria now, we try to time it so that we are always asleep together, so that we can enjoy the bliss of controlling the dreams with each other. After we got past the hardest dreams, and revealed the worst parts of ourselves, dreaming together became much easier and more pleasant, and now I crave it as much as I crave her body and her blood. Why oh why can’t I just be on a plane, dreaming with her right now?

But no, here I am in some preposterous waking nightmare, having to put up with these loathsome men, a smirking vampire and a smirking human sitting together and staring up at me as though I am entertaining them.

My fists want to pound both of them straight into the floor of this crowded bar. My ribbons of darkness are stymied in the presence of the older vampire, not to mention the weird human, and it seems that my fists are all that is left to me. But neither one of them is doing anything that would justify pummeling them to death in front of every human in this airport, other than their annoying existence, so I stand looming over them. Besides, I have no desire to touch the human again. I snarl, and I scowl, and I growl, and I clench my fists, and it just makes them giggle, and that makes me growl some more.

Gregor shakes his head and speaks. This newcomer turns his head to the human, appearing unaccountably eager to hear whatever he has to say. I begin to return to my theory that Gregor has been working for him all along.

“Levant, really,” Gregor says, “try not to make a spectacle of yourself. Please. People are staring. Won’t you please have a seat?”

I furiously jerk my chair back over to the table and perch on it, ready to leap back to my feet if needed, my fists on the table before me, glaring. The two of them exchange a glance, as though they find my behavior to be very unseemly.

Gregor shrugs, clearly resigning himself to the fact that this is the best he is going to get from me. He turns to the other man. “Hello,” he tells the vampire. “My name is Gregor. I am very pleased to meet you.”

The vampire glances at me, tosses his ridiculous flowing golden hair with an elegant shake of his head, and looks back over to Gregor. Extending his hand for a shake, he says, “Nice to meet you, Gregor. My name is Clyde.”

Gregor purses his lips contemplatively and doesn’t move his hands out from under his arms. He just nods instead, and Clyde retracts his hand, clearly bemused at this apparent rudeness.

Pity. I would have liked to see that. If Gregor could suck away all my darkness, presumably he could do the same to Clyde.

Now they both look at me, as though expecting me to participate in this charade of civil introductions. I just glare. Gregor sighs very slightly, and says, “My new friend here is named Levant.”

Clyde lifts one finely shaped eyebrow. “New friend?”

Gregor smiles. “Ah, yes, Levant and I just met here a few minutes ago.”

Ugh. I’m still waiting to see what kind of threat this vampire poses. Why has he come here? They are acting like they have never met before, but it is just so unlikely that I can’t believe it. Why would these two strange creatures come around bothering me, while I’m alone and minding my own business, unless they have an agenda? Some trap is waiting to spring, I just know it is.

But I can’t think of any way to avoid it. Tepes will want a report about this unknown vampire, so I shouldn’t leave until I see how this plays out. The vampire can obviously find me even if I go somewhere else in the airport. That troublesome human might reach out and touch me again if I try to walk past him. And I can’t just leave the airport. Not only do I not want to miss my flight when it gets rescheduled, but I’m pretty sure the sun is still up outside and I don’t want to be exposed to the light.

Hmph. I try again to pull more darkness to me, the only comfort that I have outside of Maria’s presence, but again the shadows are strangely inflexible and uncooperative, apparently obeying the old vampire. Or maybe the human. Growl….

Clyde

I keep an eye on the vampire, of course, in my peripheral vision, with all of his glowering and exaggerated grumpiness. What is his problem? But he seems quiescent for now, not actively trying to engage in a fight, so I turn my attention to the human.

Just as Levant is unjustifiably hostile, Gregor is inexplicably friendly. Other than his strange reluctance to shake my hand, he has been nothing but open. Does he not understand what we are? I know I look fairly normal, unlike this dark brute growling at the table, but I also know that humans instinctively sense a menace from my mere presence. Other than the way that he keeps his arms curled protectively around himself, Gregor seems perfectly at ease.

I ask him, “You really just met?” I assumed they were engaged in some common enterprise. Why else would the vampire, whose expression is nothing short of murderous, allow the human to exist so close to him?

He smirks over at Levant, then looks back to me. “Yes, I’m afraid I have imposed my company on our friend here. He seemed like a very interesting person to meet during the layover delay.”

A laugh bursts out of me, realizing what has happened. The cranky vampire was sitting here by himself, and this brazen human came strolling over and joined him? Ha!

Gregor grins, and Levant’s eyebrows lower so far that his eyes are practically consumed by them. Oh my!

I’m planning to continue making small talk, but Gregor seems distracted for a moment, looking to the side, then he glances across at each of us. “Gentlemen, I believe that there will be no further flights tonight. The weather is unlikely to allow it. It seems that Levant and I will be stranded in Atlanta until morning.”

Levant looks outraged, and I’m a bit confused. I didn’t see Gregor get out a smartphone to check a weather or news app, there was no announcement, and furthermore he is facing towards the back of the bar, with the board showing flight delays out in the concourse behind him. His timing of making this statement just seems odd to me. Also it is interesting that he specified that he and Levant will be stranded. How does he know that I am not also a passenger?

Then over the airport loudspeaker, an announcement. “Attention all passengers, the weather service has issued a tornado warning, and all flights are canceled for the rest of the evening. Service will resume in the morning. You may check with your gate agent for information about hotels in the area.”

There is an uproar among the humans in the terminal, including those in this bar. Loud voices are raised in dismay and annoyance, and people start standing from their tables, milling around, either trying to decide what to do next, or rushing to get to a new destination, probably trying to beat the crowd out of the airport to ground transportation. There is a great deal of sudden activity all around us, while we still sit at the table in our dark corner.

Out of the side of my eye I see Levant clench his fist around his heavy crystal glass of whiskey, and he lifts it to his mouth and drains it in one gulp. But I am primarily looking at Gregor. How did he know? I think there might be more to this human than meets the eye.

He smiles over at me with a strangely knowing look, and shrugs, as though he can tell that I am speculating about him. Then he looks over at Levant. “I am sure we can find a more comfortable place to pass the night than an airport terminal,” he says, then he glances at me as though expecting me to offer the hospitality of my home.

The cheek of this human! I suppose if it was just him I might offer, but it is out of the question to invite the ominous, brooding vampire into my home. I don’t want him to know anything about where I live or who I live with. It is one thing to try to get to know another vampire, but it is another thing entirely to place the slightest bit of trust in them. And I cannot generate even the smallest iota of trust in this personification of simmering violence. He is not welcome in my home.

I remain silent.

Gregor seems to suppress a smile, then says, “Well, I plan to look into getting a hotel room for the night. Would either of you like to come with me? I would love to continue our conversation.” He smiles over at the scowling vampire across from him. “And perhaps, Levant, you could have a little rest, maybe dream of Maria?”

Oh dear. I don’t know why, but that statement has triggered Levant like nothing else has. His face darkens even further, as if that is even possible, and I can sense a rage explode within him. In a split second he has wrenched his arm back, his hand still holding his heavy glass, and is clearly planning to hurl it straight at Gregor.

I react instantly, and push Gregor to the side so that the glass will not hit him. Better to be pushed off his chair than to be brained by a whiskey glass. He goes helplessly flying off to the side, careening to the floor.

And now I see the trap that Levant has set. The instant that I am distracted, as I touch Gregor to push him out of harm’s way, I feel Levant launch an all-out assault against my control of the darkness. I have no idea how, but he somehow instantaneously drains all of my shadows straight out of me. All of my protective darkness flees, before Gregor has even hit the floor, and I am left feeling more weak and powerless than I have in many decades.

Levant realizes this, and launches himself at me, physically, clearly planning to pummel me with his fists, and I am left without my darkness to protect myself. I find myself facing the prospect of actual hand-to-hand combat with another vampire.

How distasteful!

Levant

I see now the trap they have set. The weather certainly can’t be part of their plan, but it has played beautifully into their scheme. Gregor and Clyde have waited until the moment that they believe they can get me to go with them, to leave the airport, where they no doubt intend to ambush me outside of the view of the crowd of humans. This has all been a setup, just as I suspected.

Their plan is too obvious and preposterous to work, of course, but then I hear Maria’s name again in Gregor’s filthy mouth and I cannot allow that to go unpunished. How dare he mention her again, try to bring her into this.

I am longing to jump across this goddamned table and beat him to death, but I remember just in time that I can’t touch him. I have a projectile in my hand, though, don’t I? I pull back my arm to throw the glass straight through his arrogant head. I don’t even care who is watching. Surveillance videos won’t show me anyway, it will just look like the glass comes hurtling out of nowhere when the forensics teams examine the footage. I’ll be long gone by then, possibly fighting with this vampire, but at least we’ll be away from this dreadful little human, and out of the airport. I can feel that the sun has set, I can run out of the airport in an instant.

The way that Clyde reacts to protect him at first confirms for me the fact that they are working together. Why would he want to save a human otherwise? But then I doubt it, because he pushes Gregor off his chair, which means that he touches him, and the same thing happens to Clyde that had happened to me.

I can sense it, with more than my eyes, when the darkness Clyde is holding simply evaporates out of him, and he is left bare and unprotected. I don’t take the time to try to gather it to myself. Now is my chance to defend myself against his plan, now that he is weakened by the desertion of his shadows.

I leap over at him, drawing my fist back as I go, and am able to land a mighty blow directly on his jaw. He falls off his chair too, and I hit him again, with my other fist, before he has the chance to start calling the shadows back to him.

I don’t have the chance either, but I think as long as we are boxing, neither of us will be able to gather much darkness, and this fight will be decided by fists alone. I have the absolute advantage there, against this little sissy blond.

He strikes me in the stomach with surprising strength, considering his genteel appearance, and I pull back my left arm and land a liver punch directly into his right side. I feel at least one of my knuckles fracture from the impact, but I also have the satisfaction of hearing the whoof of air out of his lungs and seeing him collapse in front of me.

I haven’t forgotten about all of the humans, but this fight hasn’t gotten loud enough yet, here at the back of the bar, to attract their attention as they scurry around with their luggage trying to make their plans. But even if they are watching, they don’t really matter. I just have to finish off this vampire and get out of the airport and make a new plan. Clyde is wheezing on the ground, and I am moving towards him to land another blow, as he is lifting his leg in an attempt to kick me away.

Then, suddenly, every bit of strength leaves my body, and I cannot do anything but fall to the floor, unable to control any part of myself. Clyde deflates with me, and both of us are flat on our backs, limp as fish on a sunny dock. Gregor is looming over us, his hair tousled, blood streaming from a cut over one eyebrow, one hand firmly gripping each of us, wearing an expression of amusement and vexation.

“Stop it!” he commands us, very crossly, although he is also laughing at us as though we are naughty toddlers.

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