(Chapter song ‘Don’t Speak' by No Doubt)

ZEN

The last few days after my humiliation was spent hiding. I didn’t take calls. I didn’t talk to my mother. I didn’t go to council meetings.

I even shielded the shadows in my room so that Cora Marin couldn’t come into my room using her shadows. She’s a good friend, but that necromancer can be nosy as hell.

The last thing I want to talk about is how I was so stupid to believe that Avery actually wanted to marry me. And if they asked me why not, I can’t even answer.

He didn’t get anything out of being with me. He wasn’t using me for anything. He acted like he was really in love with me, then runs off with another woman? I don’t get it.

The only thing that can only make sense is I just wasn’t good enough. Something better came along and he jumped on it. I just wish I knew what I was missing.

We were tight. We understood each other. We had respect and love. What else was there?

My head hurts thinking about it, so it’s better to just not think at all.

After spending a week wallowing, I needed to jump into some serious distraction. I needed an assignment. If I have something to kill, I’ll feel better.

I pull my motorcycle into the lot of a single floor, contemporary designed building with glass walls and skylights. It’s roof slopes up to the right and glass along the front wall is mirrored.

As I walk up to the front door, I try not to look at my reflection. When I do, I confirm what I think. I look like hell. Better put on my hunter face.

I pull the door open and prepare for all the questions. Inside looks like a police station or some sort of headquarters. Because that’s what it is. The Cleaners headquarters. For obvious reasons we don’t advertise it and the front is an investment firm called Colin & Reese Inc. A company that sells stocks on the New York Stock Exchange. If you walk in, all you see is “brokers". They're sitting behind desks and talking on phones making deals, but really they’re just Hunters with a side gig. Once you walk past that, you get to the real heart of the Cleaners.

I walk down a hall, stop at an elevator and push the button. When the door opens, I step into the car and stop. When the door closes behind me, the wall on the back opens and sounds of people talking, computers and other tech fill the elevator. I step off the elevator and enter a room that looks like some doomsday disaster room.

It's large, dimly lit and the walls covered in monitors showing various parts of the world map. Others are scrolling with code and others are video calls from hunters out in the fields.

On the floor is a multitude of desks and long tables with computers on them. In the rear, a weapons cache that would make any military jealous as fuck. Everything’s in there. Including things we shouldn’t have access to, but we do because, well, connected isn’t even the word to describe us. The Cleaners have influence.

Others have tried to become us. One gang in particular had the right idea, but teens being run by an old man didn’t stand a chance. When we shut them down. We gave them a choice to do things right. The old man died in the woods somewhere I think. But the Scarlet Hood made great additions to the cause. Now, they’re run by a faction of us in the States. They wanted to keep the red, so I let it slide. It’s symbolic. Little red fighting the big scary monster and winning. I don’t do it, but a lot of the men do. They take pride in that and I respect them for it. As long as they get the job done.

I stop at the edge of the floor and look over our headquarters. The Sentinel. The human hub of vengeance. This is where our fighters make sure that we don’t lose our place on this rock and become food.

I take my bag off my shoulders and walk to one of the tables. “Looks like I walked into something big.”

Several eyes turn my way and I smile the fakest smile I’ve ever made. They blink at me like they don’t know how to act and I hate that. Most of these people were there, so to say I’m not hiding trying to hide my embarrassment is a lie.

“Zen.” Lonnie walks from a wall of TVs to me. “I was worried.”

“Worried about what?” I scoff. “Think I’d go and hunt down my ex and beat him half to death?”

He blinks at me. “That’s totally what I thought.”

I push past him and walk to the main monitoring systems in the middle of the room. “As much as I would love to, there’s no point.” I pull up a chair and can still feel the eyes as I hide behind the screens in front of me. “What are we tracking?”

He pulls up a chair and sits beside me. He leans on the table as I type. “You can’t ignore this, Zen. You need to talk about it.”

I side eye him. “No. I don’t.”

“I get the humiliation. But you know very well what happens to you when you bottle. When your dad died, you weren’t in a good place and almost got a lot of people killed.” He says low.

“I can handle this, Lonnie. I’m fine. As long as I don’t ever see him again, I’m good. I promise.” I check reports filed by other hunters as I lie through my teeth.

He's right. When my dad was killed, I went on an emotional rampage that almost got me and my entire team killed. I went for the snake head.

My father was attacked during a stake out of Lycans and Vampires. They were secretly meeting and he meant to arrest them. They killed him instead.

Damon Klouse wasn’t there, but I knew he was the one calling the shots. So I hunted him. I didn’t care if he was a council member. I didn’t care about the political environment. All I wanted was Damon’s head on a stick.

Doing so, I underestimated the strength and numbers Damon had. If I was in control of myself, I wouldn’t have led them all into Stockholm. The heart of the Vampire empire. I might as well of walked us right into the middle of vipers den bare ass naked. I don’t know what I was thinking.

This is different. I can accept that Avery doesn’t want me. As long as he stays away, I can process in private without endangering anyone else.

“What are we hunting, Lonnie?” I completely ignore his caring response.

He sighs and turns to the computer in front of him. He pulls up a map of Ireland. “Two weeks ago, it was reported that vamps were seen just outside the Dublin area, here.” He pulls up the location and I turn to it.

“Treaty busters.” I mumble.

“It looks like it. We put out a watch and more have been showing up to this farm each night. They come in groups of 5 to 10.” He shows me satellite pictures. It’s hard to see, but our skills with tech can pull up the blurs of running vamps.

“They’re a migrating hive?” I ask.

He nods. “Yes. They've set up shop there. We haven’t seen any movement except for feeders. Which means…”

“They have a Master.” I lean in and examine the farm.

“Precisely. Missing persons have also rose in the area. They’re expanding and will move as soon as that gets too small.” He points to the map.

“Ok. Call the teams. Have them prepare to leave in 20 minutes. Call Avery and…” I stop myself in mid sentence once the habit showed itself. I fight the wrecking ball that just slammed into my throat.

He quietly clears his throat as I stare at the monitor in front of me. “I’ll…um…I'll make the calls.”

“Thank you.” I whisper.

Avery was my partner in everything. We were the head of this place. Every plan I ever made had Avery’s touches all over it. I followed him into so many dangerous situations. It was reflex that I wanted him on this, but I guess he gave up on the Sentinel, too. So I’m not the only one hurting.

I get up and leave for the armory. I grab more silver bullets, UV flashlights, a machete and shit ton of wooden bolts. I walk out, hand a secondary bag to Lonnie and put my personal arsenal on my back.

I walk out of the Cleaner headquarters to the parking lot, trying to not think of Avery at all. As I cross the lot, I adjust my black biker jacket and head for my Harley. I stop and open my saddle bags to put some of my ammo in them and hear something I wasn’t prepared for.

“Zen.”

I stop as I was putting extra clips in. I slowly lift the flap and close the bag.

“I'm sorry.”

I lift my head and stare off into the parking lot. I bite my upper lip and swallow past the lump in my throat. “You’re sorry.” I say quietly trying not to break.

“Yes. I didn’t mean…”

I nod then turn. I suck in a breath as my eyes meet his. The breeze blows his perfectly cut brown hair and his stubble on his cut jawline is a little thicker than the last time I saw him. He’s wearing a grey hood sweater, black jeans and boots. He’s still muscular but looks a little leaner. He stands and stares at me with this look that says he was just late, not the asshole that left me hanging.

“You didn’t mean what? You didn’t mean to run off with some woman while I was standing at the alter looking like an idiot?” I put on my snark as I hook my thumbs on my pockets.

“No. I…” He starts.

I wave him off and throw my leg over my bike seat.

“Zen… Let me explain.” He steps to me.

“Save it, Avery. Go see your little girlfriend. I don’t need your explanations. I have work to do.” I grumble and start my bike.

The Cleaners exit the building and run to their trucks and cars to meet at the organization point. Avery watches them then turns back to me.

“You’re going on a job.” He says.

“Yes and I don’t have time for you. I have a country to save.” I pull my hair up into a ponytail.

“Let me help.” He pulls out his phone. “Where is it?”

“We don’t need you, Avery. You abandon me. You abandon the Cleaners.” I say harshly.

He lifts his eyes to me. “Zen. I’m still a hunter.”

“Not with me. Go hunt with your side chick since you think she's better than me.” I put my helmet on and rev my engine.

“ZEN! IT’S NOT WHAT YOU…”

I cut him off by throwing my bike in gear and pulling out. I leave him in the parking lot and blink back tears behind my black visor. He won’t see me cry ever. I’ll make sure he knows I couldn't care less about him.

Even though that’s the biggest damn lie on the planet.

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