The Wolves of London Book 2: The House of Striker
Chapter 38

(Chapter song ‘Criminal Mind’ by Gowan)

AVERY

The days following the battle were silent. Thankfully, I wasn’t arrested, but I do have to face Zander and answer for what I did. I’m not confident I can talk my way out of this, but I knew the consequences.

Besides, my life going forward will be mixed with both good and bad results that I will have to deal with regardless of what the king sentences me to.

I’m not only struggling with the fact that even though I’m free from my wolf, I’m bombarded with this sense of emptiness. I was empty before. I figured, how different could it be from being born without a wolf? But this does really feel different. I can still feel him. It’s like an imprint. He’s holding the space in my ribs open, but nothing's in it. It’s disturbing and hits me deeper than I expected it to. Did I actually get attached? Five years is a long time, but I didn’t think it would trump 20 years of being wolfless.

Now that he’s gone…

I sit in the council chamber in Zen’s throne. I rub my hands together as I lean on my knees. I look up to the stained glass window and see the colored glass of a wolf howling to the moon with the king behind him. Together as one. My brows come together when I can almost hear him howl inside my head as stare at the wolfs eye.

“It'll wear off.”

I lower my eyes to Dorian who’s walking into the chamber. He removes his long coat and top hat and places them on his throne then walks in my direction. He runs his fingers through his thick, short, dark brown hair and stops.

“Will it?” I mutter as I play with my fingers.

“Yeah. Just give it time. Soon, you won’t even remember what it’s like. Trust me.” He slides into Quaid’s throne beside me.

“Trust you.” I huff a small laugh and look to the floor.

I was hoping it was a secret that I could take to the grave, but Dorian made good on my request. He heard me want to marry Zen during the battle. I shouldn’t have opened my mouth. Now, it’s either life in prison or death. Wolf manipulation is a very serious crime in the shifter world, but the way I saw it, he wasn’t mine, so it shouldn’t count.

Apparently, Zander doesn’t feel the same way.

“What are you feeling, mate?” He mirrors my posture.

I take a deep breath. “Scared. Soulless. Are you sure you just took his soul?” I lean back in Zen’s throne and lay my arms on the rests.

“I’m sure. Packed him myself. It’s a natural reaction. You just need to accept that you’re alone. That’s it. Once you get that straight. You'll not only be fine, but you can heal, be faster, and stronger than most humans.” He sits back, crosses his leg, and laces his fingers. “Not to mention the life longevity.”

I roll my eyes to him. “Is that what you did?”

He laughs and places his hand on his chest. “Me? No, mate.” He grins. “My gift of life is something different.”

“What?” I slightly narrow my eyes.

He leans to me. “A magician never reveals his secrets.” He taps his nose, points to me, then leans back.

I stare at the decorative M on Zander’s throne. “This… emptiness. This feeling of betrayal. All of this is normal?”

“Ya. It is. You probably triggered some instinct on having a bloke inside, but you don’t need it. Aside from claws and teeth, what good is it, really? Bothersome, annoying, emotionally unstable. Honestly, they’re more trouble than their worth, in my opinion. We may not have asked to be born the way we were, but for some, they shouldn’t have to accept it.”

He motions his head to Zander’s throne. “That one…too hard headed to see things a different way. People shouldn’t have to live with a parasite feeding off them.”

“Parasite.” I repeat.

“The truth, if I were to define it. Every emotion. Every feeling and experience. They feed off you and twist it. They give back messes of chaos. You can’t make any sense of it. These are the wolves that need dealing with. Zander won’t see it that way. He goes on about the right to exist, but he doesn’t see it.”

“See what?” I question.

“How much of a slave he is to it. He’s a right milk boy to a beast who would kill him if he didn’t. They all are. What you did… You saved yourself from a life of servitude. Serve the beast and lose yourself. Get rid of the beast…” He meets my eyes.

“Live again.” I mutter.

“Now, ya got it, mate. Don’t worry about anything. You’re free. Be proud of that. A lot of us wish we could be. Be good with that.” He taps my cheek and sits back.

“But… don’t they protect us? They keep us alive.” I debate.

“Ah. You think that’s what you get back, but what many fail to realize is that all of it is dependent on if he wills it.” He pulls out my ring. “This creature has you by the balls, mate. He can stop all of that on the drop of dime. He can take you over. He can make you sick. He can kill people. Spill blood in your name even if you don’t want it. Then… when he’s finished with ya… he can end you. Just like that. Just stop… everything.”

I get lost in his dark brown eyes as his words get darker. “You suffer. You hurt. You see your body shrivel to nothing as he releases the years he held back. Injuries come back. The pain makes you cry tears you never cried in your life. It could be over in minutes or days, but every second you want to put a barrel on your mouth and pull. All because the bastard inside you gave up.”

He locks with my eyes a second more then collects himself. He leans back and motions to the ring. “In days you go from top of your game to ashes in the dirt all because he decided he had enough. Ya got no choice, mate. Ya never… had a choice. That’s the truth.” He drops the ring in my palm. “Sealed and secure… as promised.”

He nods to the ring as I hold it in my fingertips. “You need to be proud of that. You carried the progeny of a mass murderer in your chest. Only time would tell when he turned you. You protected yourself. You protected Zen. A wolf like that, shouldn’t see the light of day. And now, he can’t kill you for it.”

I rub my forehead. “I understand that. My problem is, I see my sister, Alexi. A good man for a mate. Two good looking boys. Sure, she had a rough start, but she was under my father’s influence. I didn’t have that. I had the labs. The doctors. They did their tests, but when I was worthless to them, they let me go. I wasn’t raised like Alexi was. Then I think of Chase. He wasn’t raised by my father either, yet turned out just as evil as he was.”

“You don’t know the future, mate. Erring on the side of caution is a valid point. Putting this wolf in a soul trap is the best course of action for someone in your position. Zen needs you. You can’t leave her yet. You just need to tell Zander the truth.” He says as he leans on the arm of the chair.

“The truth.” I mutter.

“Yes. The truth will set you free, mate.” He smiles. “I’ve been free for centuries. Try it out.” He nods as he stands.

I roll my head up to him. “What do I owe you?”

“Nothing.” He walks over to his jacket and shrugs it on. He spins and places his top hat on with both hands on the front and back. “When I need you… I'll call.” He locks with my eyes, pull his hat down above his eyes, run his fingers across the brim and smirks. He raises a hand. “Good luck.”

He strides across the floor a few steps, then turns. “Oh. When sending the invitation, please add a plus one to mine. I have a lovely lady whom I’m sure just loves weddings. Cheerio.” He bows and takes his leave.

I look down and open my fingers. The light gleams across the edge. I feel his power. His skills. His energy. It’s in there leeching into my skin. I look at the back of my other hand expecting wrinkles and pock marks. But no. Not even a blemish. My skin is still youthful and strong. I flex my fist and lower it.

‘The truth will set you free, mate.'

I look to Zander's throne and nod. “Nothing but the truth.”

The door opens and I was half expecting to see Zen, but instead, I’m met with the concerned eyes of Zander with Zayden right behind him.

I swallow and stand. “Alphas.” I nod in acknowledgment as Zayden takes the throne and Zander stands beside him.

“Avery. I’m sure you know why I called you?” Zander holds his hands behind his back.

“Yes. And I do have a reasonable explanation for what I did.” I start.

“You think there’s an excuse for you denying your wolf freedom?” Zayden raises a brow.

“Yes, Alpha. I do.” I state.

“And what would that be?” Zayden says suspiciously.

“One word… Love.” I say with all the conviction I have in the world.

****

ZEN

After realizing how bad my fuck up really was, I needed a ride. I needed to get out of there and clear my head. I don’t know how to fix what I did, but I can be there for Avery. But I can’t do anything if my heads all messed up.

I drove until it was time for Avery’s trial. I felt a little better as I park my bike in the lot. But when I see Dorian come jogging down the stairs, my emotions slammed in front, and I couldn’t get to him fast enough.

I get off my bike, slam my helmet on the seat, and rush to the bastard. “You reverse this, Black! Right now!” I throw my arm to the side aggressively as I take large steps to him.

He steps off the steps and casually walks to the stair wall. He leans his back on the wall, pulls put a black cigarette and puts it in his lips. I stop in front of him as he lights it, hauls a drag and blows the smoke to the grkjnd. I can’t see his face from under his hat.

I watch the brim slowly rise and his slightly narrowed eyes meet mine as his chin lifts. “I can’t. It’s sealed. When the magic weakens in a year, then I can possibly…”

“A YEAR?” I flop my hands out to my sides. “Avery is facing Zander. He could go to prison! Or worse! We can’t wait a year!”

“He won’t face prison, Zen. He did it to save his life. Zander will see it that way.” He says nonchalantly as he stuffs his hands in his pocket and takes another drag of his smoke.

He blows out the smoke as I close the gap and point in his face. “He better or the last thing you'll be is immortal.” I sneer as I lock with his eyes.

“You can’t kill me, love. Hence the word ‘Immortal'.” He grins, but I can see the fear behind his eyes.

“You know how relentless I am, Dorian. I promise you… I will die trying to take you out if Avery doesn’t get out of this. Prolonged life isn’t forever. Everything can be killed. Even you.” I stare at him a second longer and his smile never falters.

He takes one more drag and flicks the but into the grass. “Esmerelda. I admire your… tenacity.” He looks me over. “What I did for Avery, I did for you, as well. I spared you a pain no one of your beauty should ever experience.”

“You can’t cheat death.” I choke as I think what this all means.

He smiles and tilts his head. “My dear. I already did, and now, I use my power for good. Enjoy it.”

He turns and walks to the steps.

“Is it good?” I yell up.

He looks down as he jogs up. “Depends on who’s in the trap!” He salutes me and jogs into the council tower.

I wraps my arms around me and walk up the steps to the council chamber. I don’t know what to feel. What I saw… I didn’t think Avery was capable of going that route. A part of me is relieved he’s not dying, but the cost is too great to ignore.

I was prepared to say goodbye, but to prison or death row. I just have to pray Dorian’s right and Zander will see that Avery didn’t do this without reason.

To suppress, hinder, or bind your wolf in any way can be illegal depending on what you do. The laws were made for turned victims, mostly, who didn’t grow up with the wolves in them. Some are so desperate to ignore or get rid of them, that they'd do just about anything.

The problem with that is, it forces rogue sickness. The wolf goes insane. They need a balance of time to be wolves. This causes a huge problem for shifters because they have to answer to us. Humans don’t understand that.

Avery's situation is complicated. I just hope it’s enough.

When I get to the chamber, the session has already started. I slip in and sit in the back with the audience as Zayden takes his seat. I see Avery standing in front of them and instantly I’m filled with fear.

“I have a reasonable explanation.”

“What reason is that?”

“One word… Love.”

His word hit my heart harder than the act did. He’s standing up there sacrificing himself. Facing death because of me. He could have ran. Disappeared out of my life forever, but he’s staying this time. He’s facing unimaginable consequences for a love I don’t deserve.

I don’t know what our future will look like going forward, but I want there to be one, at least.

Please.

Whoever’s listening…

Spare him.

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