The Shadow Howlers
Chapter 12 - Selena's Secret

Selena looked out of the palace window nervously. When Zaiden took her from the Shadow Howlers pack, she had been ecstatic that he wanted her as his mate. However, now she was worried the kingdom’s people wouldn’t think she was good enough. He was the Lycan King, and she was an omega. She was also deaf and mute. No one knew what had caused it, but she had been that way since birth. She had another secret, too, that no one knew. She didn’t have a wolf.

Selena was from the Red River pack. Her family had treated her okay, but they mostly kept her locked away in the house. She knew they were ashamed of her because she had no wolf and couldn’t speak or hear. After being rescued from Last Moon, they tried to hide her back in the house again. Selena didn’t want that. Bianca had been the only one to treat her like a normal person, so when she visited the Shadow Howlers, she was going to ask if she could stay there. However, things changed quickly when she realized Zaiden was her mate. Even with no wolf, she had still felt the mate bond. Probably not as strong as she would have with a wolf, but it was still there.

She’d been at the palace for about a week, and today would be their first dinner, where Zaiden would introduce her as the future queen. He had been so good to her. He understood she had been hurt badly, so he took everything very slowly. For the first two nights, he let her sleep alone in the bed, and he slept on the couch in the bedroom. Selena had been so grateful that he wasn’t pushing her into anything she wasn’t ready for. She told him she wanted him to sleep with her on the third night. They didn’t have sex. She just wanted Zaiden to hold her, and he did. He’d been waiting for his mate for a long time and would do whatever Selena wanted.

She knew she had to tell him about not having a wolf before dinner in case it made him change his mind about wanting her as a mate. The people who worked for Zaiden treated her kindly. However, she was able to pick up on unspoken cues that most people wouldn’t notice. She had a feeling some of them weren’t happy with who or what she was. When she felt someone touch her shoulder, she jumped. It was Zaiden.

“Are you okay?” he asked when she looked at him. Selena pulled out the little notebook she always carried and wrote in it.

I need to talk to you. He took her hand and sat on the couch with her on his lap. Zaiden could tell she was anxious, and he already had a feeling he knew what she was going to say.

“Okay, sweetheart. Tell me whatever you need to.” He gave her a soft kiss, and Selena felt a little better. She wrote in her notebook and showed it to him.

I should have told you this right away, and I’m sorry I didn’t. I don’t have a wolf. Selena watched his face, and to her surprise, he smiled.

“I already know. My wolf Ash could tell you didn’t have a wolf. I didn’t say anything because I figured you would tell me when you were ready.” He smoothed her blonde hair away from her face. She was so beautiful he could spend all day just staring at her. Selena started writing in her notebook again.

You’re okay with me not having a wolf? That makes me weak. The people may not agree and not want me as their queen. He read what she wrote and looked up to see tears in her eyes. Zaiden knew there was more pain inside of her than she had let on. He hoped she trusted him enough to tell him all her nightmares one day. Until then, he would do whatever he needed to show her how much he loved her.

“Don’t worry about anyone else. You’re my mate and my queen. You will be the best queen the kingdom has ever had. I love you, and that’s all that matters.” He leaned forward to kiss her, but she stopped him as she wrote in her notebook.

You love me? Her heart raced while she waited for him to answer. Selena never allowed herself to dream that her mate would love her. She’d hoped he would tolerate her and treat her kindly, but she never thought he would love her. Zaiden held her face between his hands so she was focused only on him.

“Yes, I love you. I’ve loved you since the first moment I laid eyes on you. I will spend the rest of my life showing you just how much I love you, my queen.” When he saw tears falling from her gorgeous blue eyes, he wiped them away with his thumbs.

I love you. She showed him what she had written. She had written it several days ago but had been too scared to show him. Zaiden understood when he saw where it was in her notebook. He hugged her tight and kissed her. So far, all of their kisses had been soft and gentle, but this time, Selena wanted more.

She turned on his lap to straddle him and put her hands in his hair. When she opened her lips, Zaiden didn’t hesitate to slide his tongue into her sweet mouth. Selena met his tongue with hers, and her whole body responded to him. When they pulled apart, she smiled at him, and Zaiden’s heart melted. It was the first time she looked truly happy. Selena began writing in her notebook and showed it to him, still smiling.

Tonight, when we go to bed, I’m ready for more. Zaiden looked from the notebook in shock.

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel like you have to rush.” The last thing he wanted was for her to have any regrets. She nodded and began writing again.

I’ve been waiting until I was sure you wouldn’t send me away. I want to make love to you, Zaiden. Selena smiled at him again, and he kissed her. Her heart felt lighter, knowing that he loved her. She could see it in his eyes and how he cared for her, but having him say the words meant the world to her. He wasn’t ashamed of her and wasn’t going to hide her away because she was different. Even if she didn’t have a wolf and couldn’t speak or hear, she would be the best queen she could.

A couple of hours later, Violet was helping Selena get dressed for dinner. Violet was the one person who worked for Zaiden who she was comfortable with. She was also a werewolf and over a century old.

Selena looked at herself in the mirror and couldn’t believe what she saw. The gown Violet brought for her was shimmery gold with short sleeves. It fit her like a glove and had a slit up to the thigh. The neckline plunged somewhat, showing a hint of cleavage. Violet gave her a pair of matching gold heels. She had helped Selena put her long blonde hair in a tight twist that made her look older.

“You’re gorgeous,” Violet said when Selena looked at her. She showed her the hidden pocket she’d added so Selena could keep a small notebook inside.

Thank you for everything. She wrote. Violet kissed her cheek just as Zaiden knocked on the door.

“Come in,” Violet said. He peeked in and froze when he saw Selena. She looked at him nervously while his eyes ran over every inch of her. He slowly walked into the room, but his mouth was so dry he couldn’t speak. He suddenly wanted to cancel dinner and keep her in the bedroom for the night.

“You’re stunning,” he whispered. Selena beamed at him when she read his lips. He was wearing his royal black suit with his family crest. Zaiden kissed her lightly, afraid he would take it too far if he kissed her like he wanted to.

“Are you ready?” He asked. Selena nodded and slipped her arm into his. Zaiden looked at them in the mirror and had never felt more proud to have Selena at his side. She looked like a queen, and he was sure she’d knock everyone’s socks off.

As they made their way downstairs, Zaiden kept glancing at Selena. She seemed more confident, with a slight smile on her lips. He couldn’t wait to get her out of that dress later. He had dreamt of kissing every inch of her body, and tonight, he’d get his wish. They waited outside the dining hall doors until their arrival was announced.

When the double doors opened, Zaiden and Selena walked into the room that was packed with people. Selena smiled, but when her eyes met a man’s eyes across the room, she froze. Zaiden looked at her in concern as she tried to back out of the room. Selena began shaking as tears streamed down her face. She didn’t understand. Why was he here? She had to get away before he could hurt her.

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