Nebula Book 1: His Breeder
13

As they walked back to the group, Ak kept his gaze on the ground. He never kept his guard down while walking through this jungle. After a decade, he was finally letting his guard down.

Sudden presence on his shoulders made him stiffen. He stopped walking, throwing his surprised gaze at Kyros. The other male kept his attention locked on the horizon.

Ak kept walking, and Kyros’ arm remained thrown over his shoulders.

That scene replayed in his mind when he watched Ni’ev kneel beside a bloody Kyros. Ni’ev screamed his name, pressed his ear against his chest, and checked his breathing.

When a man ran for Ni’ev, Ak roared and cut the enemy down. He had already lost Kyros, and he refused to lose another brother.

As the group retreated, all Ak could do was remember the weight of Kyros’ arm over his shoulders. The moment had been burnt into his brain just like the first day of The Vanishing.

Everything was different now. With the lack of Kyros’ brightness and his sins leeching off his shadow, Ak’s life became dark. The only reason he kept going was that he swore a long time ago that he wouldn’t be like his father. He wouldn’t abandon his family.

He knew that his brothers didn’t want him around, but they couldn’t do anything about it. They needed the manpower to protect the group. Perhaps in the future, when they were more stable, they would run him off. Ak would be prepared if the day came. He had plans to find out what happened to Kyros, and he would travel to The Deadlands to live his last days there. It’s where criminals belonged. It’s where he would’ve been sent if Ezronian civilization hadn’t collapsed.

Arriving at The Ruins flooded him with nostalgia. As the oldest, he had the clearest memories. This was both a gift and a curse.

Weeks stretched by. His first home was quickly transforming. They dusted and cleared rooms to dismiss the past, rounded livestock to welcome their future, and made plans. Kira and Nebula couldn’t contribute by patrolling or heavy lifting, but they were still key members of the community. Ak developed a new appreciation for the females. They simplified life with their strange inventions and brightened the men’s lives with their amusing comments.

Ak didn’t really have anyone to talk with. His brothers were only interested in discussing strategy and duties with him. He found joy in finding new spices for Kira and Nebula. Although it was Kira that approved or dismissed spices, he always focused on Nebula’s reaction.

When he got tired of the loneliness, he found a few sheets of paper and started a journal.

Entry 1:

The females keep saying, “that’s what she said.” I do not understand this phrase. Who are they speaking of? And what did this third female say?

Entry 2:

The bag of flees that the females have domesticated almost got himself killed. He hopped off the staircase. I have lost many nights of sleep because of his irritating chirping, but I still rescued him. I am not sure why.

Entry 3:

I have discovered a sweet and sour spice. I think the females will like it. Perhaps I should trick them and give them something spicy. Their wrinkled nose, stuck-out tongue, and little shrieks never fail to amuse me.

Entry 4:

I want to talk with my brothers about taking care of the cave-in. I think it is about time that we dig out our childhood room.

Entry 5:

I think I know why I rescued Vee. It is because of Nebula. I did not want to see her upset by the loss of Vee.

Entry 6:

Vrox has fallen ill.

If anything were to happen to him...

(entry incomplete)

Entry 7:

Vrox’s condition remains critical.

Kira has remained level-headed and resilient. I now see her with a new light. She will be a great leader for Ezron.

Entry 8:

Vrox woke up today.

Thank the Fates.

I wish we knew what was wrong with him so that we may cure him. Nothing can happen to him. He must recover because he and Kira are our future.

I must make sure of this.

Entry 9:

Today, Nebula unbraided her hair.

She is a thief of breath.

I have never seen hair texture like hers. It is like a cloud– resistant to gravity. It is like a sun or a moon. It is a swell of beauty like the two on her chest and the two on her bottom.

We truly do not deserve females. They are devastatingly beautiful.

Entry 10:

I cannot stop looking at her.

Entry 11:

She has braided her hair once more. I am saddened.

Entry 12:

Vee came to me as I was patrolling, and he kept me company. He looked ridiculous with a braid atop his head– likely the work of one of the females, but I did not mind his presence.

Entry 13:

I asked Vrox why he used sap to clear his facial hair. He told me he keeps his face smooth because Kira likes it. I used the same sap to remove all hair from my face.

Nebula did not notice.

Entry 15:

I sparred with Rokan today. He has gotten better with handling weapons in his left hand.

Entry 16:

I did a terrible thing today.

I was the first to awake. Nebula was curled into herself nearby, sleeping. I reached for her, and I caressed her face.

I am a bad male.

Entry 17:

I found interesting supplies. They will be a good addition to the blacksmithing station. Perhaps it is time to build individual rooms for everyone.

Today, I also asked Kira what “that’s what she said,” means. She laughed. I am confused. Terran communication makes little sense.

Entry 18:

I saw Vrox touch mouths with Kira. My eyes instantly moved to Nebula. She was distracted because she was playing with Vee.

I felt jealous of both Vrox and Vee.

I am bad.

Entry 19:

I thought of Kyros a lot.

Entry 20:

Ni’ev smiled at me today. There was no anger, no anguish, no distrust in his gaze. He was genuinely amused by my comment. I do not remember what I said to make him smile, but I do remember that my stomach clenched when I saw his expression.

Entry 21:

Kira’s belly swells further with every passing day. She still distrusts me, but she is kind to me. Does she consider me a friend? I am not sure.

Entry 22:

Nebula re-did her braids today. I was blessed by the sight of her cloudy hair.

Entry 23:

There is evidence of an intruder. Things have become tense around here.

Entry 24:

We are all exhausted. Patrolling hours have been extended, and we are all on edge. I am worried about everyone’s health.

Entry 25:

The females have been experimenting with peppers. The things make my eyes burn, but I will not deny the female’s request. Their experiments are interesting, and they keep them happy.

Entry 26:

A few days have passed since my last entry. Many things have happened since then.

I am worried because four souls have joined our community. Wo’ton and his three young, strong, single grandsons have arrived. They are competition. They will find out that Nebula is not mine; that her cloudy hair is not mine to adore; her lips are not mine to enjoy; her eyes are not mine to light up.

I am full of dread. I have accepted that she is not mine, but I am not ready to accept that she is another’s.

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