Loving the leech (Guardians of Red Moon city #4)
7. Downward spiral

Kaylin’s POV

Another couple of days pass with me strapped in the cell down in the basement. No new powers arrive, and I’m slowly but surely beginning to learn to control my bloodsucking. The feelings, incidentally, I can handle reasonably well now, except the anger when I see William. Thankfully, he stays away from the basement, and today they’ll release me to move freely among the others in the house. The idea scares me because I don’t know if I’ll be able to help but attack my so-called beloved when I see him.

Ozzandra and I talk a lot about my role in the house; according to her, my solid and aggressive tendencies towards William aren’t only because he’s responsible for my involvement in everything that’s happening but also because I’m apparently dominant. Being a dominant vampire means much the same thing for the werewolves where the alpha decides; William is the clan leader, which means he’s the highest associate in their clan. But given that I’m also dominant, an alpha, my instincts tell me to attack to take over; the strongest survive and then lead the clan, regardless of whether the other dies or submits.

I consider it very macabre, honestly; there’s no need to fight for such a position, in my opinion. But on the other hand, I’m not familiar with supernatural politics at all, which means that I have no right to question the system. I have no plans whatsoever to try to take William’s clan away from him; instead, it’s about two dominant vampires who rarely manage to be in the same room for extended periods. Among other things, this is why it’s not very common with alliances and collaborations between the clans. But since we’re apparently beloveds, we also can’t escape from the fate the goddess gave us.

A relationship is twisty enough as it is, but with two dominants, it’ll be ten times worse. There will always be a power struggle between us where our dominant sides take over, and it won’t end until one of us submits to the other, however terrible it may sound. The stronger of us is the one who’ll ultimately make the most decisions in our relationship, whether we discuss the problem before or not. Ugh, now it sounds like I’ve planned to have a relationship with him, and I really haven’t! I can’t even see his face, and it also makes a connection between us an impossibility.

In addition to the new information Ozzandra gives me, I start with small training with the other guys. Benjamin is very quiet, and it turns out that he’s the little brother of William; that puts a spanner in the wheel of our eventual friendship, whether that’s the point or not. I’m having a hard time with Vivienne too, but I don’t really know why when it comes to her, maybe it’s because she’s William’s sister, I don’t know. On the other hand, Oliver and Elijah have come very close since I found out about the potential prophecy that the council will choose me to fight for my survival.

They help me with what they can, including my new enhanced abilities such as speed, strength, and senses. The first time I tried to use the speed, I got twirled and flew into a wall by accident; it was an embarrassing event I would’ve been able to survive without. However, both Oliver and Elijah thought it was super fun; the risk is that they’ll never let me forget it either. Ozzandra is the only one who can help me with the blood, I suspect it is due to her soothing aura, and with her help, I’ll hopefully be able to drink blood from the vein soon without emptying the person completely.

“Hoho? Hello?” Elijah’s voice scares the shit out of me, and I jump.

“Fuck Eli! You scared the shit out of me!” I laugh.

“You were so into your mind that you didn’t react when I came here,” he chuckles. “Are you ready for this?”

Yes, am I really ready to return to being a “free” being that can kill without having the slightest remorse for it? The others told me about my killing spree a few days ago, and I’ve never felt so bad in my life. I killed over twenty innocent humans in my hunger. How am I ever going to move on after that? Elijah says that it happens to everyone initially and that it’s almost inevitable, but that still doesn’t change what has happened. That’s why I’m afraid when they’ll let me out now because I don’t know if that’s going to happen again.

“I don’t know; maybe the best thing would be if you left me down here,” I whisper, ashamed of what I’ve done.

“Oh, nonsense!” Ozzandra exclaims when she comes into the room. “Things have gone so well! You have more self-control than I had when I first transformed. Besides, we’ll help you if it becomes problematic. I promise you’re not alone.”

I nod slowly and sigh. There’s nothing else I can do at present. Elijah carefully walks up to me and unlocks the chains around my body. I have five pieces on me, one on each wrist, one on each ankle, and one around my stomach; I can announce that they’re heavy! But it’s only now that they’re off me that I really feel the difference of weight. I rub my wrists that are bloody, and Ozzandra gasp.

“Oh, dear! How hard did you tighten them!?” she exclaims and hurries up to me to investigate my injuries.

“It’s all right Ozzie, I’m okay,” I answer.

“Kaylin,” she says, looking at me. “These handcuffs have werewolf venom on them to reduce the force the one who’s attached has; there are holes in your skin. You can die if we don’t fix this now!”

Elijah lifts me bridal style and hurries after Ozzandra up the stairs. I feel dizzy, and it’s not until I look down on my wrists that I understand why. The blood flows, and it flows fast!

“Oliver!” Ozzandra screams hysterically, and Oliver stands in the kitchen in front of us in just a few seconds.

“What the hell happened!?” he exclaims anxiously, looking at the wounds.

“I’m guessing the bleeding started a few days ago, and the handcuffs have kept the bleeding minimal with the pressure, now there’s no pressure anymore, and the poison has penetrated her blood already,” Elijah responds slowly, while Oliver hurries to bring out all sorts of strange things to use.

“How are you feeling, Kaylin?” he asks while working.

“I d-don’t k-know,” I mumble in response and feel my body getting heavier.

“Kaylin? Kaylin! You have to stay awake, babygirl,” Ozzandra says, moving to the fridge.

She comes back with a blood bag and helps me drink it. For once, I feel no desire for more blood but rather want to sleep. Suddenly William shows up and looks anxiously at me.

“You called me,” he says to Oliver.

“Oh, hell no!” I growl, and my fangs come out right away.

“Come on, Kaylin,” Elijah pleads. “You have to drink blood from your beloved. Otherwise, you’ll die. It’s as simple as that.”

“So let me die!” I exclaim, unable to let go of the fact that I got embroiled in a world where I don’t belong.

“Sorry, darling,” William says, approaching. “That’s not going to happen.”

He forces his wrist into my mouth, and almost as fast, he removes it while I still have my fangs bared and growls. I jump down from Elijah’s arms and use my enhanced speed to take me to the top floor. I don’t care how rude I must seem; I slam the door behind me. My head is spinning, and my anger is taking over. Everything around me that can break, I throw. Everything that has happened since I first encountered William has only given me pain and confusion; the feelings are overwhelming. I turn on “Reflection” with Lea Salonga at maximum volume, and as soon as I hear her voice, I tear my hair.

My breaths are irregular, a lump forms in my throat, and when my thoughts slip back to everything that matters to me, the cry isn’t far off; dad, Britney, Chris, my friends at the rehab center, and my plans for my life; gone with the wind. I’ve lost a massive part of myself and the person I once was. The old version of me neither could nor would ever kill anyone. The tears fall, and I slump shakingly down on the floor. My screams echo in the house, and I don’t care if others hear me or not. I’m utterly destroying myself, and I hate whom I’ve become; the worst thing is that my beloved is responsible for it.

How can I be expected to love and spend the rest of my life with a man who ruins it? Without thinking about it, I sing along to the song and close my eyes to calm down.

′Look at me

I will never pass for a perfect bride

Or a perfect daughter

Can it be I’m not meant to play this part

Now I see

That if I were truly to be myself, I would break my family’s heart

Who is that girl I see

Staring straight, back at me

Why is my reflection someone I don’t know

Somehow I cannot hide

Who I am

Though I’ve tried

When will my reflection show Who I am inside

When will my reflection show who I am inside.′

Again and again, I listen to the song to sing along. Slowly I calm down and feel that someone’s looking at me. I open my eyes, and my gaze meets Ozzandra. Her cheeks are wet with tears, and she smiles sadly. Music has always been a great interest, and just this song comes from the Disney movie “Mulan”; she has always been my favorite princess. I know the song by heart and continue to have it on repeat until I nail all the notes right as I usually do. My singing voice is beautiful, and it’s probably the only thing I’m happy with when it comes to myself besides the eyes I inherited from my mother.

I decrease the volume when I’m calm, and Ozzandra slowly walks up to me to wipe away my tears.

“You have a gorgeous singing voice, little bird,” she says, smiling with her tears still rolling down her cheeks. “Can’t you sing something more, please?”

I nod, smiling, and put on “Love story” by Taylor Swift. Even this song I know by heart and sing by full throat. Ozzandra sings along and grabs my hands to dance the waltz with me. When the chorus comes, we both sing soundly, and I see in the corner of my eye that the others are standing in the doorway with open mouths. Ozzandra is a natural songbird; I’ve known that for a long time when I heard her singing in the kitchen above the basement. But none of them knew that I can also sing, which makes me feel a little stronger in myself.

Before the song is over, she walks to the stereo to switch to a song that she claims is her favorite song but doesn’t know the lyrics to. I immediately recognize it and smile to myself before I naturally sing right away. She smiles encouragingly at me, and instead of her continuing to dance with me, Elijah comes forward. He bows excessively dramatically, and I take his hand. Major Lazers “Somebody to lean on” plays, and I think I hear a growl from time to time but puts no energy on it; it’s guaranteed William anyway. It’s not a calm dance but rather a dance you use at the nightclub; gratefully, none of them indicates that it’s time to talk.

Hopefully, they realize that this is what I need right now, have fun, and start processing it one day at a time. The next song comes on, and now it’s Benjamin who chooses to dance with me. He gently dances with me and spins me around like a ballerina while laughing at the faces I show every time he spins me back to himself. Oliver comes up shortly after I finished dancing with Benjamin, and I laugh at how eager he is to show his movements.

“I can bless myself; there’s no need for someone’s help. There’s no one to blame; there’s no one to save you but yourself!” we scream sing together, and it surprises me that Oliver knows songs that Lucy Hale has done.

In the end, it’s just William left; I don’t know where Vivienne is. The others leave the room when Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper’s “Shallow” plays, and he bows gently before reaching out to me. I feel some resistance, but in the end, I put my hand on his shoulder and let him lead me through the song. He sings the male part lowly to my ears alone, and let me tell you that it’s one of the most beautiful voices I’ve heard in my life! I don’t know if it’s the beloved bond or not, but at this point, it feels right to be in his arms. He looks into my eyes all the time, and his emerald eyes sparkle as I smile at him.

“I’m so sorry, Kaylin,” he whispers, and I can’t do more than nod.

I’m not ready to forgive him completely, but this is a great start. Given all his caveman tendencies since I got here, we’re far from being a couple, but now I can at least be in the same room as him without attacking. Perhaps it’s these moments of softness that we need to be able to work together towards a brighter future. He has always seemed hard and withdrawn, but now he almost seems... human. I sing the female part and continue to look into his eyes; he smiles softly. The song fits in perfectly for our separate lives and how we are as people.

We don’t know each other and know nothing more than the names in principle. The song ends, and William bows to thank me for the dance, and I curtsey. We look into each other’s eyes, and somehow we suddenly stand nose to nose. Our mouths move towards each other, and just before our lips touch each other, I get carried out. Someone’s taking me downstairs in record time. Joseph stands in front of me and grins while he holds my neck against the wall. The others come in and growl when they see what’s going on.

“Joseph, what the hell do you want this time!?” William growls.

“Tsk tsk tsk, is it so strange that I want to greet my newborn?” he asks mockingly and grins at me while I bare my teeth. “My my, you’re a feisty little lady, just the way I like them.”

“Let her go!” William growls once again, and when Joseph looks away, I decide to rip myself away from his hand, which wasn’t a good idea when I realize that his nails press into my skin.

“No, but little Kaylin,” he coos and takes a new grip on my neck to keep me even higher up than before. “Listen to me, do as I say, and I don’t need to hurt you more than necessary.”

“She’s dominant; your tone won’t work on her,” Ozzandra snarls.

“A dominant, huh?” he asks and looks at me, grinning. “How lucky you are, little dove.”

“What luck?” Benjamin asks confusedly.

Joseph grins even more and throws me into the opposite wall. I’m up on my legs fast, considering my reinforced speed, and bare my fangs at him again. He no longer grins but instead thunders his voice.

“You, Kaylin Clarkson, are selected to participate in the “arena of death” in two weeks, and believe me, I will enjoy it when I look on when the others tear you into pieces.”

He disappears as quickly as he came, Ozzandra gasps, and my legs can no longer keep me up. I’m not going to make it! The council might as well end up forcing me to fight vampires who have been predators much longer than me because the longer you’re a vampire, the more powerfully you are. My thoughts come out of my mouth in words without meaning to;

“I have two weeks left to live...”

A/N:

Hello everyone!

William is still a sob, but slowly he understands that he did wrong. Will they have time to nurse their relationship to something beautiful, or will they both break apart? Only time will tell. I thought they needed this chapter where we clearly can see how music helps Kaylin handle difficult situations and how others can understand how hard she’s taken these significant changes in her life.

❀ What did you think?

✿ Did you see it coming that she would be chosen to participate in the sick games?

❀ What do you think her chances are in surviving?

✿ Who do you feel is the best match for her among the boys?

❀ Did Kaylin get the short stick in the beloved lottery?

Please let me know your thoughts since they help me develop in my creative process! Thank you for reading, lots of love.<3

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