The knocking is loud, as though whoever is out there has been banging a while.  I blink, looking around, finding Callum and Liam stirring next to me.  I’m naked, except for Callum’s arm that’s draped over my middle and currently cupping between my legs.  Jesus.

“Bethany.”  My mother’s voice barks from outside and I practically jump out of my skin.  I know she can’t get in here to witness this scene but that doesn’t stop me from feeling the wash of shame and fear.

I can’t open the door with the boys in here.  I’m just going to have to wait for her to leave.

“Bethany,” she calls again.  Why does she always have to be so persistent?  It’s like her mom-style Spidey sense is able to detect me through wood and concrete.

The knocking stops suddenly and I let out the breath I’d been holding.  I look between the boys who are lying totally still and silent, ears angled towards the door.  Then my phone starts to ring.

Shit.

My mom knows what I’m like.  I don’t ever go anywhere without my phone.  She’s gonna know I’m in here hiding from her.

“Bethany, I know you’re in there.  Open the door.”

I stand and shuffle off the end of the bed, reaching for my silk robe that’s resting over the back of a chic-looking curved chair.  I don’t know why I’m bothering to cover my nakedness because I’m not letting her in, but it seems wrong to talk to her through the door naked.

“Mom, I’m not feeling well,” I say close to the door.

“Open the door,” Mom barks again.

“I’m sick, Mom,” I say.  “I don’t want you to catch it, okay.”

“Vomiting?” she squawks.  She’s always had a phobia, which is why I’m using it as my excuse.

“Yeah.  Maybe food poisoning.”

“Oh, that’s a shame,” she says.  It sounds like sympathy and I’m surprised momentarily until she adds, “I was going to tell you to come to dinner with Frank and the boys.  A celebration.”

I actually do feel nauseous now.

“I can’t, Mom.  I’m going back to bed.”

“Okay, sweetie.  We’ll postpone it until tomorrow.  Frank hasn’t been able to get hold of the older twins either.  They seem to be missing too.”

I hear rustling behind me as the twins swing their legs off the side of the bed and start to find their shorts.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Mom.”

“Get well, Bethany,” she calls and I hear the sound of her heels moving down the hallway.

I shuffle back toward the bed, but this time my instinct isn’t to push the boys away.  I need to hold them close because this thing we have feels like it’s going to drift away.  “Your dad is looking for you,” I tell them as Liam comes to slip his arms around me.

“You’re shaking,” he says, smoothing my sex-mussed hair away from my face.

“I’m okay.  Just…”

“Just scared out of your ever-loving mind.”

Callum places his hand on my hip and kisses the top of my head.

“She’s not going to find out, okay?”

“You don’t know my mom.  She’s got x-ray vision.  She can see through doors and hear sounds from ten miles away.”

“She’s not going to find out,” Liam says firmly.

“And what about dinner tomorrow?  How is that going to work out?” I ask, exasperated.

“We all sit around and talk like normal human beings because we are normal human beings,” Callum says.  “Just because we’ve had amazing sex, doesn’t mean we have that stamped on our forehead.”

I shake my head because they don’t get it.  Maybe they’re used to this kind of thing.  I have no idea how many times they’ve shared a girl in the past or what kind of relationships those were.  They can be flippant because this isn’t new to them, but it is new to me.

I just can’t get past the bubbling shame I feel.  It doesn’t matter how much I like them or how good they make me feel, I know that being sexual with both of them at the same time is wrong.  The trouble is that knowing it hasn’t stopped me from acting on my urges.  If anyone found out about this, especially mom and her new fiancé, I would never be able to look them in the eye again.

My family life would be over.

Mom would never forgive me for ruining her ‘new life’.

“I’m not that good an actress,” I say.

“Could have fooled me,” Callum says.  “Your mom bought that little food poisoning ruse hook, line, and sinker.”

“That was through a door.  She’d have realized I was lying straight away if I’d been standing in front of her.

“Look.  There’s no point in stressing about all this,” Liam says firmly.  “We’re a little too far into the situation to have regrets.  We just need to make sure that there is no reason for either your mom or our dad to be suspicious.  And believe me, we’ll work hard to make everything appear totally normal.”

I take a deep breath and hold it, trying to push the anxiety away from my heart.

“Okay?”  Callum asks.

I nod.

“We should go,” Liam says.  “We need to go find dad and the twins.  Find out what’s going on.”

“What are you going to do about dinner?”

“We could get you something and bring it to your room.”

As if my stomach senses the prospect of food, it growls loudly.

“I’ll get room service,” I say. If I can reduce the risk that someone might see the twins around my room, I will.

“Okay, Rio,” Callum says, bending to kiss me gently on the lips.

“We’ll see you soon,” Liam says and kisses me too.

For a second, I’m so damn grateful that they somehow came into my life.

But then, when they’re gone, I feel empty inside, like my heart already knows that it’s temporary and it’s going to be aching again soon.

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