My Luis appeared to check up on me.

“Hey, Sweetie, are you alright?” he asked.

“Yeah, I’m good,” I exhaled, but tears filled my eyes quickly. Luis stroked my cheek, and the tears I was holding in escaped my eyes.

‘Ellis is in my house, with my kids like we are all good, and these confusing feelings inside me are overwhelming… W- Whatever affection I had for him should be gone, right?” I cried. I didn’t want to cry. I didn’t, but I couldn’t help it. I can be so vulnerable to Luis.

“I

11

“What do you want?” he asked gently.

‘To be with David wholeheartedly,” I croaked.

“Oh, my candy Love,” It was one of his nicknames for me, Candy Love.

“And you know it’s more upsetting. It’s Daddy this, Daddy, that with my kids,” I chuckled humorlessly with a shake of my head. Luis wiped away my tears with his thumbs and pulled me into a warm embrace.

“You’ll figure it all out, and everything will be alright. Just wait. You’re seeing him again after so long. He was your first Love, and it wasn’t going to be easy to be free of him,” he said softly,

#F

And as for the twins, Ellis is like a new toy to them. He will fade soon, and those little monsters will crawl back to you,” he chuckled. I closed my eyes, relaxing in his hold.

4/5

11

Mummy! I’m done brushing my teeth!” Solara called from the bathroom.

Coming, baby!” I clumsily cleared all traces of tears from my face before going to the bathroom.

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5/5

Father – Son Talk

Ellis.

I couldn’t believe this was happening. I spent the morning with my kids, and even though we failed to make a delicious breakfast we could all enjoy, I was just thankful for this time with them. And Love, she was gracious, a little nervous than I am used to but still hospitable to me. It was more than I deserved after what I did to her.

Our children are a priority in her life. She was the best mother. I caught her smiling as she watched us at the table, even though she tried to hide her smile. It warmed my heart. THIS IS LIFE, THIS SHOULD HAVE BEEN MY EVERYDAY LIFE had I not f ucked up six

years ago.

I was in my son’s room, helping him with school. As he brushed his teeth in the bathroom, I inspected the room. It was a blue-themed huge bedroom with an adjoining playroom. There were video games and toys there. Like every room in the house, it overlooked the massive forest.

I’m done!” he said.

I helped him get into the neatly laid-out clothes in the closet. Cayden was observing the entire time. I don’t know what he wanted to see, but he was curious about my actions. He was complex, just minutes ago in front of his mom, and sister, he was talking to me normally, and happily. Now, he was curt and seemed irritated by my presence.

“I don’t like you,” he said suddenly. He got my attention now. I finished tying his shoelaces and straightened up. He stood up from the bed, and went to his desk, next to the computer. Looks like we were about to have a solemn conversation with my son.

“I know, I figured,” I said.

“1

Good. It’s exhausting to pretend to like you,”

1 walked back closer to him. He didn’t look at me. He unbacked his

school bag, searching for something in it.

Why do you pretend?”

“I pinky promised my sister I have to be nice to you,” he said, opening his book and starting to write. That’s when I realized he was writing his homework.

11

11

Can you write and talk?” I asked. His face angled.

Just give me two minutes,” he murmured. His whole focus was on what he was writing in his notebook. I waited patiently and watched him as he finished his homework. He put his notebook away and faced me seriously. I exhaled.

Why did Solara make you promise?” I asked.

She doesn’t want you to leave again,” he replied, and my heart tightened painfully in my chest. She thinks I’ll leave. I felt the weight of his words hit me like a truck.

‘I’m not leaving you again, ever,” I declared. He only shrugged his shoulder.

Cay, I-” I started, but he glared at me. Looks like we are not too buddy-buddy right now to say, Cay. I cleared my throat, and corrected myself,

11

Cayden, why don’t you like me?”

“I know you were not on Mars. I know why mommy left,” his voice was soft. My son was hurt, and I wanted to hug him and tell him it wasn’t my intention. I didn’t want his mom to leave.

11

‘Mom and uncle thought I was sleeping in my room, but I went to her room because I was scared, and I heard them talk about you. They

2/4

don’t know I was listening,”

Lerouched down and held his face in my hand.

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