Chapter 40: Ethan

I step out on to the balcony of Damien’s home as the sun rises in the distances, painting the beach his home rests on with an orange-yellow glow and casting the unforgettable warming feeling that I could only ever experience while on Earth.

Nothing else ever compares, in all the years I’ve spent out in space, the sunrise on Earth is the greatest feeling in the world.

“So this is what a sunrise on Earth feels like huh?” A voice says behind me.

I close my eyes and smile “Welcome back to life son,” I reply to Leon.

Leon walks up beside me, looking like my son again. He smiles and closes his eyes, taking in the sunlight.

“Sixteen years...I hardly remember this place anymore dad,” He says in a low tone.

“That’s what makes it so beautiful when you return son. You can leave for as long as you want, but once you come back to this planet, it’s still your home in the end. This...the beauty you see before you, aside from the buildings and pollution, is part of why I choose to fight for Earth for so long,” I explain.

Leon opens his eyes and looks at me, a more serious expression crossing his face.

“I saw her dad, the little girl. I don’t know if it was my mind playing tricks on me, but she...seemed almost...like a haunting spirit,” he says.

I smile slightly.

“Funny how she works that way huh? You know, even after I was cured and we got the hell out of that place, that bitch still won’t leave me alone. I don’t know if it’s just the infection, bad memories, or her bitter soul deciding to haunt me; but for whatever reason, I can never seem to get rid of the damn memories she put into my head. Every other night, they flash through my head: war, genocide, murder, rape, death, over and over again. You know it’s bad son, when you’re so used to seeing such images that you’re still able to sleep soundly in your bed. Thing is, I knew that little girl before those damn scientists contorted and deformed everything that she was. Little Katie I called her...”

A small smile comes over my face “She was a hell of a little girl son. Most kind-hearted little thing I had ever seen. I could never say no to her either, it was always ‘one more Mr. Blake, one more’ I practically adopted that child on Andromeda. And when they took her...those scientists were lucky I didn’t kill all of them. And...when they carried her...limp body... from the lab...it took everything...everything in my will not to slaughter them all. In all honesty, I loved that little girl, like she was my own blood. Her parents were gone, so I figured maybe once I got out, I’d just adopt her. But because of those bastards she never got to see those days. And then the irony...of having to dream of the thing she had become every single night of your life, now that’s...that’s beyond bad luck. You escaped it while you could son, and I thank God that you didn’t have to suffer such a fate as I do...” I finish, small tears rolling down my face.

Leon looks at me and places a hand on my shoulder. “All these years, I’ve wondered...why...why you were tormented so badly by the memories. I feel like I can understand you now father, in some way, I’m able to understand you on a level that no one else can. I don’t know why, but she showed me, among all of the other images, what happened to everyone on the Zeus. It was like I was there and watching everything that was happening. She made me feel your pain, your fear, your anxiety, everything. It was an experience I will never want to do over again, but it gave me true understanding of what really happened to you,” Leon explains to me, sounding as if his whole life were enlightened.

“That little girl works in mysterious ways, and let’s just hope that wherever she is, her soul is at peace and...normal,” I respond.

Leon smiles and nods his head in agreement. “So...what’s next dad?”

“Well son, I’d imagine that we all do what we want. Your mother and I plan on getting another ship and participating in the war that has once again started with the Sekrid. Of course, your uncle needs to report mission accomplished and be debriefed. Then he’ll be thrown right back into the fray on the front-lines. I don’t know what Dante is planning on doing yet. You and Stella still need to discuss what you’re doing as far as your service is concerned. Way your mother and I see it, both of you are qualified for servicemen status,”

“What about Rin’Gal dad? I mean, he is considered an enemy of the Earth now. Considering he took down the best ship in the fleet,” Leon asks concerned.

A hard expression paints my face as I ponder the question.

I run my hand through my hair, not quite able to think of an answer.

“Well...I won’t turn him in or kill him. He’s helped us too much to do such a thing, that would just be cowardice and traitorous. I don’t know son, his best bet would be to go back to his own planet and be reinstated in to their armed forces,”

“But wouldn’t that mean...”

“Yeah son, I’d be facing him head on in the battles to come,” I say with a sigh.

“Do you think you’d be able to do that?” Leon asks me in return.

I slightly glance at him and return to staring into the distance.

“We’re both men of honor. Though we may be friends now, when duty is to defeat the other in war, we shall both do so with unquestioned loyalty. It will be hard to do so, but if I must, I will strike with as much force as I would anyone else. Rin’Gal would do the same, that’s just how we are Leon,”

“But think about this dad, sometimes the best thing, isn’t always the just thing. Sometimes it means going above doing what you’re told...and doing what your heart and mind tells you to do,” Leon replies wisely.

I chuckle a little bit and look at Leon.

“You really are my son you know that? Hell, I would’ve said the same exact thing, right down to the last word if I were you. I don’t know, maybe when the time comes, we’ll both be able to survive,” I say as I start to ponder.

Midday came all too quickly after that conversation and I find myself falling back into old habits.

I stare at myself in the mirror as I tighten my tie on my uniform. The knot reaches a comfortable position and I leave it where it is.

I let my arms drape to my side as I sigh and stare my reflection in the eyes. Small tears streak my face as the thoughts of prior events rush my mind.

I had pushed back the thoughts of every on the Poseidon that passed during the attack.

I take a seat on the edge of the bed and lay my face in my hands, unable to avert the sorrow that has taken hold of my thoughts. I allow the tears to fall for a few minutes before pulling myself together and letting the sadness pass.

I place my hand on my forehead and stare at the ground. I shake my head and disbelief.

all those people... I think to myself.

I stare into the mirror with a closed hand placed over my mouth and ponder my own mortality.

I should’ve died so many times before. Why...why me?

I look down at my closed hand, grief overcoming me once again.

“Are you alright Ethan?” Elena says standing in the doorway of our borrowed room.

I look back in to the mirror and stare at her.

I sigh, “Yeah, I’ll be fine honey. It’s just...all finally starting to set in. I knew every one of those cadets personally. Even the bad ones...and now they’re all gone, every single god damn one of them Elena,”

“That’s not your fault Ethan, and you need to come to terms with that,” Elena says, looking me in the eyes through the mirror, a look of concern veiling her face.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Of course you can,”

“How is it that I chose to save and befriend the very person responsible for those people’s deaths? How could anyone not just shoot him and be done with it?”

“Because Ethan, you aren’t just anyone. Anyone else would choose to blame him for everything rather than trying to look at the big picture and realize it wasn’t just Rin’Gal. You realize that there are others who orchestrated those chain of events and set them in motion. You see that Rin’Gal, albeit his military prestige, is simply a pawn in a much bigger game of chess that his leaders are playing with us,”

I turn around and look at Elena for a moment.

I stand up and traverse the room before embracing her in my arms. I release her and look her in the eyes smiling.

“You never say much in these conversations. But then again, you never have to. Your words are always filled with more knowledge than I can understand. I’m so proud that I can call you my wife Elena, because you always find a way to pull me out of the darkness,”

Elena smiles and kisses me with that ever-soft kiss that I never get tired of. Elena releases the kiss and smiles at me one more time.

“Come on, Stella and Leon have decided what they wanted to do,” She says motioning me downstairs.

I nod my head in agreement and follow her downstairs into the living. We both sit down on the couch as Stella and Leon makes small talk on the loveseat across from us.

They look up at us simultaneously with small smiles on their faces, excited to give us their news.

“Well? You just gonna sit there looking goofy all day or are you gonna tell us?” I say jokingly.

Leon and Stella look at each and then Stella begins first.

“Well, we’ve talked for a while about it, and I’ve decided that I’m going to do exactly what I had planned, I’m going to attend the Flight Candidate School, here on Earth. I got my acceptance letter while on the ship. They wanted me as soon as I graduated from the academy,” Stella finishes.

“That’s a girl, gonna take after me and be an ace pilot,” Dante says chiming in, smiling with pride.

Stella grins back at him, happy with Dante’s approval.

“How about you, Leon?” I ask.

“I know it may upset you two a bit, it upset Stella too but...I wanna be on the lines with everyone else fighting. I was thinking I’d join the SSEALs. I’ve heard they’re being reinstated for the war. They haven’t been needed for a long time, and now that they’re back in action I’d thought I’d be one of the first to welcome the unit back by joining,” Leon finishes.

Damien enters the room, grinning at Leon; Tanya is in tow with him.

“Well I’ll be damned; if I were twenty years younger, I’d be right behind you with that Leon. What do you think about that Ethan?”

I glance at Damien, and then back at Leon.

I can tell that Elena is already concerned by the way she’s gripping my arm.

“All I have to say to that Leon is...I’m proud that you want to make a decision like that. It takes a select person to want to do such a job. The SSEALs are nothing to scoff at, and neither is their training or field work,”

“Yeah no shit they aren’t. Your father and I worked with a couple of transfers after the SSEALs were decommissioned and those fuckers...forget it, might as well just let them do all the work, not like you’ll get to do anything anyway,” Damien says adding his two sense.

I nod my head in agreement and look back at Leon.

“Just one thing Leon, please don’t try and be a hero. All the real heroes are in the ground. Don’t make your mother and I bury you,”

“I promise, I won’t be too reckless,” Leon answers sincerely.

“Alright, it’s settled then. We’ll get started on everything tomorrow. The sooner, the better,” I say nodding a few times.

The road ahead is going to be long, and arduous.

With everyone going on their separate paths, things will be even worse.

The bad is behind us, but I fear the worst yet to come. This is going to be the hardest journey yet, and somehow, we all have to find a way to pull through it...

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