Chapter 0233

Rowan

"Sir? Is there anything you need me to get for you from the restaurant?" My secretary asks, but I continue staring outside my office window.

The view was really great. It was one of the reasons why I chose it, but today it didn't offer me the tranquility it usually does.

"No. Not today," I answer without looking at her.

"Okay then, I'll be back in thirty minutes"

I don't answer her and after a few seconds I hear the door closing. I sigh in frustration. For some reason the feeling of foreboding clung to me. It surrounded me in waves. Today more so than the previous days I don't know what it is, but my heart is anxious. I can't settle nor can I fucking focus. It's like

trying to tell me something, but I can't figure out what.

my soul is

Trying to distract myself, I think about Ava and our talk. I get her. Damn do I get her hesitation. I've spent

more than ten years drilling into her that Emma was the only woman I'll ever love.

I did everything in my power to show her just how little I cared for her. I've spent nine years punishing her

for something that was beyond her control. I drilled into her head that I hated her with every fiber of my being.

How then could I turn around and claim to love her?

It's frustrating as hell, but I understand her. I understand her reluctance to believe me. If the roles had been switched I wouldn't have believed it so easily.

Apart from all that, I also have to consider the pain I've caused her. Nine years of pain and mistreatment isn't something you get over within a day or week. Hell. It will probably take years to heal the wounds! in The scars will remain with her though and considering the damage I caused, I can't help but wonder if she'll ever forgive me.

I want her. I want her in my life. I want to build a life with her. I crave that more than anything, but if she doesn't take me back, then let it be so. I'll have no one to blame but myself. It will be my penance for the I try to focus on her. To focus on her beautiful face and tactics I could use to get her to take me back, but

I've never felt this way before. Never had this unshakable feeling like something bad was going to happen.

ry to assure myself, but it doesn't work. I stand up and start pacing again. I felt wired. Like I was going

crazy.

I run my hand through my hair, probably messing it up, but I don't fucking care. Not when I feel like my fucking heart was being squeezed by a tight fist..

I turn on the TV. Maybe hearing other people's voices will help me calm down. It was better than listening

my own since it was distorted, jumbled and confused the hell out of me.

to my

I don't know for how long I stood pacing through the room when my door opened. I turn to find Gabe. He looked like hell froze over. He was breathing heavily, his eyes looked bloodshot and there was worry an anguish in them.

I still in my tracks. Fuck. My brother is usually impeccable and not easily fazed. We share that trait as

twins. If he looks anything other than that then something serious must be wrong.

"What is it?" ask as my heart rate picks up.

Fuck was it our parent's? Maybe Noah?

"Ro..." he starts but doesn't finish his sentence. His voice was mixed with pain.

"Fuck, Gabe. Tell me what's wrong. Is it mom or dad?"

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