Downpour: A Grumpy Sunshine Romance (The Griffith Brothers Book 2)
Downpour: Chapter 26

“I’m gonna change,” Ray said as we caravanned into his house after dinner at Claire and Silas’s house with the whole family.

It should have been a great night, and it was. For the most part, at least.

Until he confirmed the reality I was avoiding.

This was temporary.

I was just his employee.

It didn’t mean anything, no matter what he said or how much I wanted my feelings to be real. No matter how much he made me believe they were real.

It was all smoke and mirrors. A convenient way for us to pass the time.

I couldn’t imagine a world without Ray. Without his family. Without this place. I didn’t want to.

For so long I had felt like I was drifting on the breeze, flitting and floating at the whim of the wind. Being here felt like I finally had a purpose. Like I was doing something that mattered, even if it was small.

I waited until Ray’s bathroom door closed to let the first tear slip down my cheek. I didn’t want him to see me cry. It was stupid to cry over something that never was.

I scribbled out a note that I was going on a walk and left it on the kitchen counter. I was the one who was supposed to be ignoring him, but now I needed space.

Guilt chipped away at me like acid chewing through metal as my flip-flops snapped down the dirt path.

I was so stupid. I shouldn’t have gotten involved with him in the first place. What did I think was going to happen? We were going to just fall into life together and live happily ever after?

Things like that didn’t happen to me.

As much as I wanted to believe that good things happened to good people, it just wasn’t true.

I found myself in the stables, trading my flip-flops for a pair of communal rubber boots to clean the empty stalls. I like the monotony of the tasks. It was nice to put my energy into something and see the payoff when I was done. The mostly mindless tasks gave my brain a rest.

But with that rest came the intrusive thoughts that picked away at my already fragile feelings.

Sweat beaded on my forehead as I propped the pitchfork against the wall and grabbed the broom to sweep out Anny’s stall. She was grazing in a fenced area, which meant CJ would be down here sooner or later to ride her out to the herd or put her in her stall for the night.

With any luck, it would be the latter end of “sooner or later,” and I could disappear after taking my frustrations out on some dirty hay and bedding.

Truck engines and ATVs rumbled in the distance. It wasn’t uncommon to hear people out and about at all hours of the night.

The ranch hands worked odd hours. Because as much as the cows slept and rested, trouble didn’t.

The dust and cobwebs were gone from Anarchy’s stall, but the ones in my mind were thicker than ever.

I would need a good rain to get rid of those.

The coldness that chilled Ray’s voice when he answered Gracie was the crack of thunder before the downpour.

Tears streamed down my cheeks in a torrent as I slid down the stall partition and sat hunched up on the swept floor.

I lost my family, but at least I slept knowing I had been wanted and loved. Life just had other plans. But this time, I couldn’t work through grief by holding on to small fragments of gratitude.

He really was just tolerating me. Making the best of us being stuck together.

I shouldn’t have slept with him. Every time one of his brothers or sisters-in-law teased us about hooking up, I wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

They would never respect me. Ray would never respect me. I was just a convenient piece of ass.

Heavy footsteps echoed through the barn. “Brooke?”

I didn’t make a peep, but I was fairly certain my sniffles gave me away. CJ poked his head into Anny’s stall and found me in a heap on the floor.

“What are you doing in my barn?” He crossed his arms and huffed. “You know, even the ranch hands don’t sleep with the animals. We’re somewhat civilized in the bunkhouse.”

I wiped my cheeks, accidentally smearing dust and dirt across my skin. “I just needed a breather.”

He looked around. “And manual labor was the answer? You know, you don’t get paid to muck stalls.”

“I know. I just wanted something to do. I’m sorry if I messed it up.”

CJ grabbed a bale of straw from the stack and tossed it into the stall. It landed with a thud. Two more followed it. “Ray’s looking for you.”

I spread the straw out to make a suitable bed for Anny. “I’m off the clock.”

CJ took to cleaning the water and feed bins. “I don’t think that means much to him.”

“He can deal with it. He’s fine without me, and I need space.”

CJ chuckled. “He’s never been good at taking ‘no’ for an answer.”

I paused and looked at him with pleading eyes. “I just want to hide for a little bit.”

He shrugged. “Suit yourself, but Ray will figure out a way to find you.”

We finished turning over Anny’s stall in silence, and CJ brought her in for the night.

She immediately started nuzzling into my neck when she got close enough.

“Hey, gorgeous,” I said as I loved on her. “You’re not as mean as everyone says you are.”

CJ laughed. “No, she is.” He smoothed his hand down her glossy black coat. “But for some reason she likes you.”

“I won’t be out here too much longer,” I promised.

He shrugged and headed out. “Can’t say I didn’t warn you. Good luck with your night.”

I found companionship with the horses. They judged, but there was no unwanted commentary. If they liked me, they’d let me stay around. If not, they were gone. I appreciated the simplicity of that. Animals were good judges of character.

The sputter of a golf cart rattled me out of the silent chat I was having with myself.

“Brooke?” Ray roared through the quiet of the stables.

Anny glared at the barn doors, and I didn’t blame her.

“Brooke—“ he paused. “I don’t know your fucking middle name or I’d use it.”

The clatter of metal piqued my curiosity and drew me out from Anny’s stall. I peered around the corner. Ray was sitting in the driver’s seat of a golf cart, in the process of pulling his wheelchair out of the back and opening it up on the ground beside him.

Shit.

“Brooke,” he shouted again when he heard me shuffling in the hay. Brown eyes landed on mine. His jaw was locked tight as he slid out of the golf cart and into his wheelchair.

I swallowed. At least we were alone. The horses wouldn’t tell anyone about him yelling at me.

“Where the fuck have you been?” he snapped as he rolled into the barn.

I turned my back to him and smoothed my hand down Anny’s nose. “I left a note. I said I was going on a walk.”

Ray let out the most sarcastic laugh I had ever heard. “You left a note. Right. Because the last time you went on a walk you almost died of heatstroke. So unless you’re going to let me put a goddamn tracking chip in the back of your neck, then no. A note is not fucking good enough.”

“I don’t understand why you’re angry,” I said calmly. “How’d you even get down here? Did CJ rat me out?”

“CJ didn’t tell me shit,” he snapped. “Don’t ask me why, but I just knew you’d be in here.”

“Well, if you knew I’d be here, then you know why I’m here and not at your house. So, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be spending the rest of my time off the clock away from my boss.”

“Brooke,” Ray said as he shoved on the wheels and pushed himself into the entrance of Anny’s stall.

Anarchy lunged at him, snapping at his head as a warning.

“Jesus—fuck—” Ray shoved backward. “What the hell is her problem?”

“She doesn’t like people who don’t respect her space. And neither do I. You don’t get to be angry at me, Ray.”

Heat blazed in his eyes. “I do get to be angry. Do you understand how fucking worried I was? You can’t just walk away from me without an explanation. You don’t get to do that. Not when I care about you.”

I gritted my teeth. “I absolutely get to walk away. Especially because I’m just the girl who works for the company that you hired to send help.”

He was visibly taken aback.

“Yeah.” I grabbed the broom and pitchfork and stomped out of the stall to hide the fact that tears were filling my eyes. “That felt great after spending the weekend thinking that I meant something to you.”

Ray caught me around the waist, and the tools clattered in my hands. “You do mean something to me. Do you understand that? Coming out of the bathroom and finding you gone scared the shit out of me.”

I jerked out of his grasp and put the tools back on the hanging organizer. “Could have fooled me.”

“I care about you!” His shout cracked like a whip.

I spun on him. “You don’t get to say that and think it’ll make everything better. Your family knows we’ve been fooling around. You saying that I’m just ‘the help’ hurt me, and you know it.”

I felt stupid for the tears running down my face, but I stopped caring what he thought of me the minute I didn’t mean anything to him.

“I’ve never been anything but honest,” I said as I pulled off the rubber boots and slipped back into my flip-flops.

“It’s the truth. I pay you,” he said.

My vision blurred and burned. “Fuck. You,” I spat.

“Brooke.” His hand shackled my wrist. “I’m not denying anything.”

“What happened to all those things you said to me in the truck? Huh? Where was that guy? I get that this isn’t easy for you, but if I’m not mistaken, you’re the one who figures it out. So stop being a fucking coward and figure it out.”

“I’m trying!” he shouted. “But every fucking time I think I can do this, something reminds me that I can’t. Someone broke into my house. What if we had been there? What if I couldn’t protect you? You don’t think that weighs on me?”

“That’s your problem,” I yelled back. “I’m sorry, but I’ve told you how I feel. I can tell you that I want you just like this until I’m blue in the face, but believing it is on you.”

He froze.

I had a headache from crying, and I was over it. “I’m going back to my house,” I said, utterly exasperated. “I’ll see you on Monday.”

I could hear the crunch of his wheelchair rolling over debris and hay as he came up behind me.

Warm hands slid up my hips. “Stay,” he rasped as he leaned forward and rested his forehead on the small of my back. “I promise I’m working on it. I swear to you. I just need… I just need more time. I’m trying to figure it out.”

I wanted to fall into him and trust that he wasn’t playing games with my heart. “You don’t get to say that. It’s not a fix. You don’t get to buy time with empty promises.”

“I love you,” he said softly and calmly from behind me. “I do. And that’s why I’m trying really fucking hard not to hurt you. That’s why you can’t be with me.”

“That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“I love you and that’s why I want better for you. I want someone good for you.”

I turned to face him. “You are the greatest good.”

His hands slid up my hips and pulled me closer. He pressed a kiss between the waist of my shorts and the hem of my tank top, taking advantage of the strip of skin that peeked out from between them.

“You matter to me. Please know that.” His words were a whisper, caressing my body.

I slid my fingers through his hair, holding him closer. “I don’t want you to beg. I want you to prove it to me.”

Ray pushed the cuff of my shorts up my thigh and pressed his lips to my leg. “I will.” He left a path of warm kisses up my inner thigh. “I’ll prove it to you every fucking day.”

A soft sigh escaped my lips as his stubble scraped my skin. “You know what happens when you get hurt, right?”

“Hmm?”

“You have to kiss it and make it better.”

His chuckle was dark and comforting like a glass of whiskey by a rain-spattered window. “Drop your shorts, baby girl.”

I wiggled them down without hesitation as he slid his middle finger through my soaked pussy.

“Take off your shirt and bend your back over the saddle stand. I want to see how flexible you are. I want to see your eyes while I make good on my promises.”

I eyed the empty saddle stand. It was about three feet off the ground and had a smooth, curved wooden top. Two ornate knobs were fastened to the top on either end to keep the saddles from sliding off. I pulled off my tank top and bra and left them in a pile with my shorts and underwear.

“Like this?” I asked as I laid back against the side of the curved top. It forced my back into a tall arch. My hair hung off the other side in a waterfall of curls. A breeze tickled my breasts and I was suddenly all too aware of where and how naked I was.

Ray wheeled over and locked his chair in front of me. “That’s my good girl. Just like that.” His hands glided up my thighs, spreading them apart. “On your tiptoes now.”

I pushed up onto my toes, a little further over the saddle stand, and his mouth latched onto my clit.

I let out a high-pitched whine, startling the horses in their stalls. Ray growled into my pussy as he sucked and bit until I was a wet, writhing mess.

“One foot up onto my chair. It’s locked,” he said as he reached forward and grabbed the knobs on the top of the stand. Ray dropped his gym shorts and boxers, and pulled himself up. The blunt head of his cock teased my entrance as he lined himself up. “Lean back as far as you can.”

I peered over my chest through heavy eyes, watching as he held onto the ends of the saddle stand to support his bodyweight. “You good?” I asked quietly.

He let out a sharp breath as he nudged inside of me. “I’m steady. I’ve got it—got you.” Ray’s biceps rippled as he snapped forward, pushing inside of me.

I whimpered as I was filled and stretched. The second and third thrusts knocked the air out of my lungs.

“I’m gonna figure my shit out,” he grunted as he fucked me hard over the saddle stand. “Might take a while. But I’ll do it. I’m not letting you go.”

“Keep me,” I whispered in desperate pants as he stole my breath. Heat boiled inside of me as he shifted all of his weight to the grip he held with his right hand and used his left to toy with my clit.

My toes curled and my back went rigid.

“Goddamn, baby girl. I feel you squeezing my dick. Come for me.” He switched to slow, massaging strokes and shallow pumps. “I want you to shatter. You can break. I’ll be here to pick you up. I’m not going anywhere.”

His arm started to tremble as I reached my peak. Ray pulled out and slammed inside of me once more. The slide of his dick into me ignited my release. I cried out as I came, reaching for him. Ray grabbed the top of the saddle stand and held on, his body pressed to mine, as he came inside of me.

Our breath mingled as our heart rates slowed together.

“I need to sit down,” he croaked as he pressed a reverent kiss to my sternum.

I nodded as he pulled out of me and dropped down into his chair.

His grin was Cheshire. “Goddamn, you’re a sight to see. Bent back like that, tits in the air, my cum dripping down your leg.” He licked his lips and inhaled deeply before leaning forward to kiss my knee. “I’m sorry I made you feel unwanted.”

I pushed myself up and stopped when my head spun. “Keep proving to me that I am wanted. That’s all I need.”

Ray helped me clean up and dress quickly. As much of a turn on as the possibility of getting caught was, I didn’t actually want to get caught.

When I had put on my shorts and shirt, he took my hand in his and kissed my knuckles. “Let’s go.”

I made sure everything was where it was supposed to be and followed him outside. An old golf cart was parked just outside the door.

I stopped in my tracks. I knew he had somehow gotten down here, but I hadn’t thought about the logistics. “You drove?”

“CJ got some parts at the hardware store to convert it to hand controls,” he said as he maneuvered out of his chair and into the driver’s seat. “He brought it over for a test drive after the horse delivery while you were out with the girls.”

I helped fold the chair and placed it in the back before hopping in with him.

Ray started the engine and pushed a lever for the gas pedal, then turned the steering wheel to head back to his house.

“You know,” I said as I rested my head on his shoulder and felt the night air swirling around us. “I think I like you driving me around.”

Ray chuckled and leaned over to give my head a quick kiss. “That makes two of us.”

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